Brittain, Vera, Diary, 22 August 1915

00000298-17.jpg
Description: 
Diary of Vera Brittain

Tabs

Case Study: 
From Youth to Experience: Vera Brittain’s Work for Peace in Two World Wars
Creator: 
Brittain, Vera
Source: 
diary
Date: 
22 August 1915
Collection/Fonds: 
Contributer: 
McMaster University Libraries
Rights: 
Vera Brittain estate; McMaster University has a non-exclusive licence to publish this document.

Identifier: 
00000298-17
Language: 
eng
Type: 
image
Format: 
jpg
Transcript: 

again a little puzzled.
"You see," I said, "If one goes on obviously mourning someone, other people come along & insist on entering in & pitying and sympathising, and they force one's recollection into one's outward life & spoil it all. But if one seems to have forgotten, the world lets one alone & thinks one is just like everyone else, but that does not matter. One lives one's outer life & they see that, but below it all lies the memory, unspoiled & intact. By marrying the first reasonable person that asked me, I should thereby be enabled to keep you; my remembrance would live with me always & be my very own. Do you understand a little."
"Yes," he said very gravely, "I think I understand what you mean."
"But I won't think of that now;" I said, "At least, now, I have you here with me, & nothing else matters."
No, nothing else mattered. It was he & I then, no one else, no past nor future, but just the person and the hour. I had taken off my hat because I loved the soft sea-breeze to blow over my face & hair. His arm was round me still & with his other hand he gently played with the little wisps of hair that the wind blew over my face. After a time he rested his head against my shoulder & we became quite silent... I never though that anything would ever happen to me like this. They say every woman has her hour. I don't quite believe that, for I fear that some have none, & most of the others are lucky enough to have more than one. This at all events was one of mine. I knew I was worshipped and I came very near to believing -- what is hardest of everything for me to believe --